Then the National Museum was right there in the harbor! We got little sandwiches in their cafe. The shrimp was so full of dill I couldn’t t eat it and my other sandwich was just cream cheese and apricot jam. Bob’s mom got a delicious looking fried filet and Bob’s hamburger was also unpleasantly dilly. The one thing I ordered for fun, for adventure, was the only really good thing- brown cheese ice cream! It was very mild. the National Gallery was huge, and so much Munch!
Today I was trying to get a cruise on this sailing ship
But I ended up on one of these. I think the fancy sailing ships are only for sunset wine cruises. Well, make the best of it. There were nice shaded areas to sit. We passed by my mecca – The Munch Museum!
And the opera building
…and a UFO apparently.
The Oslo Fjord was pretty much just a big harbor, but it’s always nice to be out on the water on a sunny day.“She Lies is a public sculpture by Monica Bonvicini made of stainless steel and glass panels, measuring approximately 12 metres (39 ft) by 17 metres (56 ft) by 16 metres (52 ft), next to the Oslo Opera House in Norway.” wiki
What a crazy few days of jetlag. We arrived around 5pm yesterday and I was knocked out. I had taken a back pain pill to sleep on the plane. Bob’s mom arrived around midnight and they went and hung out. Our single beds have these plush fake down beds on top of the bed, and they slid around. Think nylon sleeping bags on stairs. So I slid off the bed twice. Otherwise it’s a very nice place. I also went from 98 degree weather to 58 degree weather, which is refreshing but weird.
I have two q2uestions I ask myself when I am in a new place:
Do people look at you or smile or greet you when you pass?
Norwegians not only look at you, they openly stare at you. But it is kind of a frank, open look with no judgement, just a vague bit of curiosity. Mostly men stare at me, but their eyes never leave your face. (After 2 weeks I had only seen one other redhead, and I dye mine a bright color, so I realized that was probably the cause for all the staring).
The buffet breakfast was even more elaborate than others we have seen. And they say Americans eat too much! I love beans and eggs, plus they had my weakness…Swedish pancakes! I was not into the liverwurst or pickled fish, but Bridin was.
I LOVE beans and eggs! Maybe it’s my British heritage or maybe it’s Anne Margaret.
We need to talk about the brown cheese, or brunost, as it is more appetizingly called. It is the pride of Norway, produced on mountain farms. One would expect it to be strong and dark, but it is very mild and creamy. It is lightly caramelized, almost like dulce de leche, and it is eaten in small amounts. It was originally a way to be frugal and use up natural by-products. The cheese is made with whey, milk and cream from goats and cows. It varies by brand and farm.
Then we just slept the Jet Lag on and off. We woke up in time to have tapas at La Sangria. It was very authentically Spanish and very dusty. I realllyyyyy liked the Spanish tortilla. It’s more like a frittata full of potatoes. My old roommate taught me how to make it. The meatballs and bacala were really good. Bob liked the wings. There was also charcuterie, a decent beef stew and so. many. olives.
I got back into bed and woke up on the floor between the beds. Then I had a dream that my brother Greg’s ghost was teasing me and I ran at him, like, “I’ll get YOOUUU!!!” and I reached out the snatch himm but he dissipated into Scooby Doo smoke. And then I hurt so bad. I had violently thrown myself off the bed. It felt like someone socked me in the jaw and I hurt my shoulder and hip. We pushed the beds together to try to fix it, but I just slid down between the beds. Considering some of the horror stories you read about what is under hotel beds, I was grateful I didn’t land on a dead body. I took the slippery featherbed off and slept just fine right on the bed thing. Finally we were moved into a normal room with an awesome view.
Brenda, chef/proprietress of Brenda’s. Brenda’s Meat and Three and Brenda’s Oakland, comes from a long line of French and Filipino inhabitants of New Orleans, which explains the ube beignet. Besides ube, they also serve crawfish, Ghirardelli chocolate, and apple beignets. The purple yam was too heavy for a beignet dough, and although it was good, it was too heavy, like a cake donut, and should maybe just be used as a filling. I’m not saying we didn’t eat it, and I’m not saying it wasn’t good, I’m just saying it pushed the boundaries of the word “beignet.”
The flagship of the restaurants, Brenda’s French Soul Food, was opened in 2007 by Brenda and partner, Libby, followed by Meat and Three. More than 10 years later, Brenda’s Oakland was born. next they plan on setting up in Temecula.
I was very excited to see catfish Benedict on the menu. It was amaaazing! Why isn’t everyone doing it? The tomato gravy on the shrimp and grits was so flavorful it was as if I had just grown new tastebuds, and the cream biscuits! Oh my God, the biscuits! Light as a feather. It was as if every other breakfast I had ever eaten was just phoning it in.
So they have these things called Space Bars. They are legal in SF, especially if you join a church. Well, someone I know joined the Church of Joe. But of course, I would never, because someday someone looking to hire me might read this blog. And it would only have been because everyone was staring at me grinning, and I felt a dare, which I can’t resist.
So, my brother took off, and we went and sat under a shady tree until Redd Kross came on. We were at the front of the stage, next to Martin and the Linda Lindas who were slamming there. Eloisa is a force in the slam pit. She would grab some guy and literally throw them at me. Other than a Neurotica song, a 90s hit and Pretty Please Me, Redd Kross did songs from their new album. They wore matching paint-splattered outfits which somehow managed to look cool and not 80s at all. But Steve was still rocking his cult leader vibe whereas Jeff was reminding me of Dave Vanian and Roy Orbison.
and what was this???
Steve did a good Robin Zander, “This…next…song…is …the..first..song…on…our NEW album!” Then I noticed Jeff and Steve kept looking at me, and I was like, “Why does Steve keep looking at me?” I mean, I do know them, so it wouldn’t be CRAZY, and most musicians tend to look into cameras and I had my phone out. But I started wondering if maybe the Space Bar that I definitely did not eat was making me paranoid, so I retreated to the shade again. But later I looked at my pictures and I AM NOT CRAZY.
I went back to the shade, and a woman offered me a big orange camping chair she had brought. They always looked uncomfortable, but if you sit kind of sideways, you can cozy up like a baby with your head on the edge. Everything was OK as long as I was in the Orange Chair. Then the B-52s started playing, and the people behind me were like, “Oh my God! They sound sooo good! I love this song!!!” ironically making it impossible for me to hear and enjoy the awesome voices and songs.
So, were I the type to do this, I would have taken another half square of chocolate and beelined for the sound booth, where the sound is always the best. Then I waded into the crowd until it resisted. There was a man with a giant fan annoying everybody, but I asked him to go THWAP! like they do at the drag clubs. He went THWAP! and it made us both so happy we were instant friends. In fact, EVERYBODY was my friend. We were one big undulating mass of music and good vibes while the back of my neck was fanned with cool air. The harmonies of the B-52s were angelic and the projections on the screen behind them were super psychedelic.
I was afraid of taking too many videos because I didn’t want to burn up my battery and have no way of getting an Uber back to the hotel, because I had no idea where Bob was in this undulating mass of 10,000 or more. So this next video is a short clip. I headed for the exit and heard my name. There was Bob, back under the shade tree. And there was the Orange Chair. Bob asked me if I wanted to stay for the encore, and the lady said I could sit in the Orange Chair again, so I curled up in the big orange womb and listened to Rock Lobster.
The B-52s were incomparable. I’m so happy I got to see them again before they retire. I saw them in 1982 at the US Festival.
The park for Mosswood was much bigger than I expected. There was a row of food booths, but we had been stuffing ourselves before hitting the event. there were shops, lots of records and band T-shirts. We met the guy from Hollywood Book and Poster, who will be opening down the street from us. One booth was cutting bangs for donations to the World Central Kitchen, one of my main charities, so I just got side-swept bangs.
My hairdresser with cool tattoos
We also ran into Martin and a few of the Linda Lindas. martin had saved a shirt for Bob commemorating the Linda Lindas opening for the Rolling Stones. Yes, you heard that right – the Rolling Stones!!!
I met a lot of cool-looking people.
I have always loved Pansy Division, a band at the forefront of Queercore, though their press says they were the first punks to be so unabashedly gay….hello, Glen Meadmore anyone? Anyways, in 1991 guitarist/singer Jon Ginoli and bassist/vocalist Chris Freeman started the band in San Francisco, (although Chris now lives in Silver Lake, because when I drive past him I scream, “Woooooo Pansy Division!!!” at him. They put out an album a year for six years then opened for Green Day on tour, which must have been so weird.
John Waters went so super pornographic in his intro, so I am just providing the link here.
They played one of my favorite songs, which is both funny and tragic, about a friend who had AIDS. I guess life is often both funny and tragic. I like the line, “Denny’s dramatic, he’s kind of dark. He ain’t nothin’ like the restaurant.” But then the sad part:
He’s got “HIV Positive” tattooed in black
In 6 inch letters on his back
Says “I want them to see
What they’ve done to me”
Denny
There are so many amazing international restaurants in Oakland now. We got takeout for breakfast from the Koffee Pot. It was a little hole in the wall that could be easily overlooked. It is owned by a nice Vietnamese family who kept most of the original recipes. I ordered one of my favorites, the Loco Moco and splurged on a Vietnamese coffee. Loco Moco is all about the gravy and theirs was perfection. The dish is rounded out by a beef patty and rice. They even included a bonus slice of Spam. Bob ordered a basic breakfast sandwich and said it was out standing.
We met my brother and nephew for lunch at Teni East Kitchen. I was so excited about the Burmese food from Bib Gourmand Chef/owner Tiyo Shibabaw, I forgot to take pictures – me! Can you imagine? But the employees said I could use photos off of their website. So, although I am pretty strict about using my own photos, they are really nice ones. Thank you, Teni East Kitchen! For four of us I ordered:
ROTI WITH DIP (v) fresh fluffy bread with curry dip
I became obsessed with roti in Toronto, where they roll it around fillings like a burrito. Malaysian places in LA serve it with delicious curry dips. Teni’s kicked ass.
PEA SHOOT SALAD Teni Signature salad (available vegetarian) (gf) This is my photo…LOVE pea shoots!!!
COCONUT BAY LEAF SHRIMP (gf) coconut with bay leaf, garlic & spices
Coconut shrimp curry is photographed at Teni East Kitchen in Oakland, Calif., on Wednesday, July 19, 2017. The restaurant serves Burmese cuisine with a California twist. (Doug Duran/Bay Area News Group)
CRISPY SPICY CATFISH (gf) fresh catfish fillet with tamarind balachung chili oil. You know how I feel about catfish. This was served in strips, like fish and chips. It came with a spicy chili oil. If I lived in Oakland I would go there every week.
GINGER TURMERIC CHICKEN OR SHRIMP (gf) ginger turmeric chicken or shrimp w/mushrooms & marble potatoes. All in all, it was amazing, and if you are headed that way, I can’t recommend these two places enough.
If you ask around for the best BBQ in Oakland, the answer is inevitably Horn’s. Recipient of a well-deserved Michelin Bib Gourmand award, what started as a pop-up has found a new home. The interior is very simple but very hipster, with a full bar (But no Bloody Marys…what’s up with that?).
Matt Horn grew up helping with his grandmother’s BBQ, and when this Inglewood local caught BBQ fever in his early 20s, he discovered you couldn’t have an open fire there. So, he headed up to Fresno where he perfected his technique. He calls his ‘que West Coast style, but it’s heavily influenced by Texas. He started out selling at Farmers Markets, then pop-ups before going brick and mortar.
Our flight into Oakland was delayed, so by the time we arrived to meet my brother and nephew at Horns they had already ordered the plate in the photo above as a sampler. The brisket, which is cooked up to 18 hours, was heavenly, but the sausage was way too hot for me. It didn’t seem to bother anyone else, so I guess I’m just a wimp.
I went up to the bar to order (then they holler your name from the kitchen when it’s ready). I had to order the burnt ends and greens, Bob’s favorites, beans, and mac and cheese for my sister-in-law. I also ordered corn bread and the banana pudding Matt’s wife Nina makes, of course. Usually with cornbread it is either Marie Callendars-style cake, or dry, crumbly cast iron skillet style. Horn’s cornbread was big and fluffy, like the cake style, but had the flavor of skillet corn bread. It was a nice break between the intensely flavored meats and sides. They were so big we split them in half, so we had lots of leftovers. The banana pudding could have used more bananas, and more time for the Nilla wafers to soften, but the pudding was delicious. Where I jumped the shark was ordering more brisket, which we could not even eat.
Service was friendly and they checked in on us. 10/10 I would go back tomorrow if I weren’t still full 7 hours after lunch. We checked into our hotel and immediately had a nap.
The Mosswood Meltdown was formerly called Burgerama, until Burger Records had a Me Too moment. Nonetheless, it’s back with the same diverse, punk rock, queer lineup and host John Waters. We usually couldn’t really afford it, but this year was B-52s, Redd Kross, The Mummies and Big Freedia. I was disappointed that they posted the lineup but they didn’t post the schedule until a week before, so my flight was booked. I would have taken Monday off. The park itself is in an iffy neighborhood but we got a nice hotel called Kissell’s Uptown Oakland about a mile away.
I liked their flag, making everyone feel welcome.
The beds were SO comfortable, I could have lounged around in them all day.
Saturday Lauren arranged a swamp tour. I love the swamps; it’s one of my happy places I go to in my mind when I’m experiencing pain or anxiety. We chose this tour because it was super Cajun and they give the best tours. It was a beautiful day.
I had watched a documentary on a cursed swamp about a month before the trip. A voodoo priestess named Julia Brown was upset that the new German settlers were cutting down the Cypress trees, causing the land to erode, making everyone’s property smaller. She is said to have sung songs on her porch, specifically one that said when she died she was taking the whole town with her. During her funeral, a massive hurricane hit and destroyed the town, killing everyone except for three people who made it onto the train trestle. Some people say the swamp is still cursed. They didn’t find all of the bodies, so there are also stories about hauntings.
This is a longer video if you are interested.
I didn’t even realize we were in the cursed Manchec Swamp until I saw this cemetery. This is rumored to be the people who were at Julia Brown’s funeral, so their bodies were found.
This is said to be the grave of Julia Brown, but people say it is just for tourists, and she was buried somewhere in an unmarked grave.
Some people are surprised when I tell them how beautiful swamps are.
They had a baby alligator and some turtles for us to check out. The tape around the gator’s mouth comes on and off easily and doesn’t hurt him. Turtles are Bob’s spirit animal.
I got kind of obsessed with this gator, and I was leaning out of the boat taking pictures. It was making Bob nervous, and he kept telling me to stop. Finally the tour guide snapped at me to get back in the boat. That made me lean back in really fast. I didn’t know there was a crab trap hanging next to me where I was sitting in the corner of the boat. When I jumped back, I hit the trap and it swung around and hit me in the back. I thought the alligator had jumped on me!
More gators
Ed took a video of people feeding marshmallows to the alligators.
Russell called us from Bayona on Friday and invited us to lunch. We rushed over and made ourselves comfortable in the elegant dining room. Chef Susan Spicer’s cooking is influenced by international flavors from Spain, Italy, France, the Mediterranean, and India. I’m trying to remember what everyone ate. Grilled beef tenderloin, either chicken or duck, and I had a quail salad.
Doreen Ketchens plays clarinet in front of Rouse’s in the afternoons. We were hoping to catch her during this visit. I had forgotten Russell used to play the clarinet himself, so it was perfect. I checked the time, and she was playing right at that moment, so we walked a few blocks down to Royal. When we first walked up, Russell commented, “I’ve never heard a tuba solo before.”
I realized I hadn’t either, and pointed out that he was Doreen’s husband.
Doreen Ketchens has been called Lady Louie, Miss Satchmo and The Female Louis Armstrong. She combines classical and jazz to make her own sound.
I love these people. Mike and Lauren, Ed and Anne, and cousin Maureen.
We were pleased to discover that not only had Dat Dog reserved a part of the balcony for us, but an entire upstairs room with a dedicated bartender and a server who would come up and take orders!
I was especially pleased to see Anne, my best friend since just after high school, because we are always there for each other when a family member dies. We help with the funeral and offer support. Also, my favorite cousin Maureen. My other cousins, Patti and Paul were there, but I had asked that their guests not come to the vow renewal part of the celebration since I didn’t know if I would just cry the whole time or what would happen. I needed my closest friends, and they were there, my bridesmaid Lyssa, and Mike and Lauren Guerena, who make everything fun. It was a fun environment in general. Of course, Russell and Monette were with me all day.
Of course, I wasn’t in a state to be photographing food. There were so many trippy hotdogs. Cod, vegan bangers, alligator, Guinness, etc. Ed and I split a really good chili dog. Bob and I split this one, but it was spicy:
Of course, everyone said that Greg would never want to get in the way of a party, and it was even suggested that he chose that morning so he could attend in spirit. I only had to hide around the corner and cry once.
My Canadian cousins, Paul and Lyssa and her husband
Instead of a traditional veil, I had my friend Monique, who makes tiki headdresses, make me a special white headdress. One of the feathers got lost in transit, but it gave it a bit more of a flair to not be perfectly even. As is her wont, Lyssa was right there in the bathroom with me pinning and clipping on the headdress. I told her I was going to rent her out as a maid of honor and she was like noooooooo, I’ve done my last wedding! (Photo by Mike)
Maybe it was the shock, but I was able to let go and have a beautiful and fun ceremony. Maybe it’s because I love Bob so much, and he had really thought about his vows.
As happy as we all are, I’m holding onto Anne for support.
I had made second line umbrellas, although we had the ceremony too early for the brass bands. But they were nice for decor.
We ordered cupcakes from Bywater Bakery, which were amaaazing! I bought 3 dozen, thinking it would be enough to give the restaurant staff, but we really went to town. The Berry Chantilly were the best!
Berry Chantilly
White almond cake, filled with mascarpone chantilly icing, layered with seasonal berries
Lemon Chantilly
Yellow butter cake soaked in lemon simple syrup, filled with whipped lemon chantilly cream and topped with fresh fruit
Coconut Cream
White almond cake soaked in coconut milk, covered in coconut cream.
Chocolate Doberge
Yellow butter cake filled with a chocolate custard, thinly iced in buttercream and finished with poured chocolate ganache.
After the ceremony, (which only cost $250!!! Plus we tipped $50. Would 10/10 recommend a hot dog wedding), we wandered Frenchman Street, shopping outdoor markets, looking at art and listening to bands on the street and in the bars. Don’t forget to tip the musicians! We met up with my cousins’ friends, and I even drank an ice-cold Abita Amber. Great fun!
Galatoire’s is one of my favorite restaurants in New Orleans. It’s very fancy, so it wasn’t the kind of place I would cry in. In spite of barely drinking for years, as soon as I sat down, I ordered a Milk Punch.
Since it was so crowded, without even looking at the menu, I also ordered the Grand Goute for us to share. It is a trio of cold appetizers that usually comes with shrimp, but there was some problem bringing the shrimp in off the boats while we were there, so they substituted a fried oyster brochette, crawfish remoulade and crawfish with a mustardy sauce. When Russell gestured to the plate and said, “This was a good idea,” I felt strangely validated. He and Greg had taught me almost everything I know about fine dining, and Russell is a world-class orderer who always gets the exact right amount of food for the table, never too much, never too little.
But this was a weird meal, and Russell started ordering bottles of wine. I can’t even imagine how much they must have cost. As I always have to, I explained again that I don’t like wine. When pressed, I will admit that I only like champagne. I didn’t mean for him to order a bottle of champagne.
Monette must not have been very hungry because she just ordered turtle soup…a local specialty.
Bob and Russell both ordered fish – drum?
I was pleased that we were outside California so I could order my favorite splurge…seared foie gras. And for anyone who has a problem, I’ll say this, “I’d rather be a foie gras goose than a Foster Farms chicken any day.” I also ordered Eggs Sardou, because you just have to. It is an egg with hollandaise over an artichoke heart and spinach.
When we left, I couldn’t finish the champagne in my glass, and neither could Bob. He wasn’t a jerk about it, but Russell totally lost his mind. But we are on medications we aren’t supposed to drink with and had already pushed it. In retrospect, I should have finished the champagne. For Russell. While we were there, a second line band came in. I stood up and started twirling my napkin. There was such a sense of bonhomie, I realized that’s what I needed. Music and people. I said, “Let’s do the wedding.”
My eldest brother Greg and I always had a special relationship; maybe because He was the oldest and I was the youngest. He taught me a lot about the world, proper manners in different Asian restaurants, how to not “bruise” champagne and a lot of Toastmaster stuff. he was smart and funny and generous if a little intense at times. He stuck by me when no one else did.
He had been suffering from Hydrocephalus for a long time before getting diagnosed, then spent the last 5 years of his life in nursing homes. I had medical POA and sat up with him in the hospital during surgeries, celebrated even minor holidays with him and was basically his emotional support animal. The week before this trip to New Orleans he was in the hospital on a breathing machine with pneumonia and the doctors didn’t expect him to make it. They took him off the ventilator and he was fine. I saw him Saturday in the hospital and he was looking good and talking and everything.
I visited him Monday before leaving Tuesday for New Orleans. I was shocked at how quickly he had deteriorated but we had a wedding renewal planned and I could see him when I came back and show him the pictures.
Thursday morning, the day of the ceremony scheduled for 5, my other brother Russell showed up unannounced at my hotel, which was very out of character for him. He and Bob went off to have a private conversation, which was also weird. All Russell had to say was “The nursing home called…” and he choked up and I started crying. I moved from the bar to a couch so people wouldn’t see me crying, then up to my room.
What were we going to do? We had invited 16 people to travel down to New Orleans with us, but I was broken. Finally, I said, “Well, we have to eat…there’s a place across the street…”
Russell said, “If we’re going to eat, we are going to Galatoire’s” so I washed my face and we walked the block over…
Frank and Barbara Chifici founded Deanie’s Seafood Market and Restaurant, which is now run by their kids. The family included farmers, cooks, and purveyors. They have three different locations, but our hotel was right across the street from the French Quarter location. We tried to go there on the first night, but there was a 40-minute wait. You would think that they were Irish, not Sicilian, because you are greeted with a bowl of potatoes. I was excited for their stuffed crab, one of my favorite ad hoc sandwich fillings.
Our timing was good because it was Happy Hour and apps were half off. Luckily my cousin Maureen joined us, because there was A LOT of food. Deep-fried artichokes were addictive.
We started by ordering crab dip, though in this photo you can see we left it standing since I knew it would stay hot the longest.
Also, bacon-wrapped shrimp, though it was a bit salty for me.
I went back another night for a solo steak dinner when Bob didn’t want to go out. It may be strange to order steak at a seafood restaurant, but I had eaten SO MUCH seafood by that time.
Then the National Museum was right there in the harbor! We got little sandwiches in their cafe. The shrimp was so full of dill I couldn’t t eat it and my other sandwich was just cream cheese and apricot jam. Bob’s mom got a delicious looking fried filet and Bob’s hamburger was also unpleasantly dilly. The one thing I ordered for fun, for adventure, was the only really good thing- brown cheese ice cream! It was very mild. the National Gallery was huge, and so much Munch!
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