Here, Eat This! The Adventures of Kiki Maraschino

That little shop in the market whet my appetite for some thrifting and I found several places within walking distance. I like taking pics of the buildings as I wander. I felt very safe just creeping down empty lanes and alleys.

I liked this painting. I was looking for one like it for ages for my retired seafarer room.

Another painting that caught my eye…why is the angel forcing that child off the cliff?

I loved this little person, but they were super heavy. I can only buy small and lightweight souvenirs.

I did buy one of these. It seems like the back should be open for you to store your garlic, but it’s a purely decorative anthropomorphized garlic.

There were lots of trippy figurines.

I was naturally drawn to the albums

IYKYK

and the dolls…

The second thrift store I went to was closed for another 30 minutes and I decided not to wait, but this cat hung out with me for a while.

Afterwards I had lunch in a hipster Asian fusion place called TEIKA, where I was finally able to explain to someone how to make real iced tea!

There were gladiolas everywhere. We didn’t know where the fields were, but it seemed every single person was casually carrying a bunch home from the market.

I started off with their delicious wild mushroom soup, which I had ordered to go the other day and had to return for. It has little pate choux dumplings in it.

Followed by shrimp in a buttery sauce meant to be eaten on French bread.

I ended with a salad that had many of my favorite ingredients: dried cranberries, raspberries, almonds and arugula, but it was advertised as burrata and seemed to be whipped brie. Very unusual. It was topped with an adorable chunk of honeycomb.

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Monday Morning, I wandered over to the pharmacy to pick up a few things. I had to get something for mosquito bites and Bob wanted baby aspirin. I used my finely honed mime skills and semi-literate translation app. We were doing OK, with her figuring out everything I needed until I scared the crap out of her.

“You can’t give aspirin to babies!!! Aspirin will hurt the baby!!!”

“No, for me, for the heart.”

“For you,  not for baby? No aspirin for the baby???”

“No, I’m not going to hurt the baby! I mean, there is no baby! Only me.”

So if you’re ever in Eastern Europe, ask for “Cardio aspirin.” NOT “baby aspirin.”

We met up with Bob’s mom and went to the movies. I love the movies here because they have these snacks that are like styrofoam bacon. You know Asian shrimp chips? Like that, only little bacon chips. I had thought we were buying too much, but Bob’s mom was right. I ate the whole dang container.

One of Bridin’s favorite restaurants is Olive. They have a varied menu, but everything we have tried so far is delicious. Fruity iced drinks are very popular right now. But they are made with mixes. It’s very hard to get regular iced tea made with real black tea.

We shared shrimp on rosti. It was fantastic.

I ordered a curry with handmade tagliatelle.

Sometimes it’s nice to just have a mellow day.

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1. We had a lovely day visiting the outdoor market, then hit the grocery store, which I always find fascinating. Just like last year, there were huge jars of chanterelles for 4 Euro, and this year they had boletus.

The mushroom monger wanted to take a selfie after I asked him if I could photograph his wares.

Last time I was fascinated by the pictures in a closed thrift store. It was open, and I went in. With the current anti-Russian sentiment, I was very surprised to see this.

I love the market!!!!

We then hit the grocery store. I could peruse grocery stores for hours.

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Bob’s favorite restaurant in Liepaja is Patnieka Maja, which translates to “Postman’s House.” It makes us joke about Dr Zhivago and a mime-type joke of  “past-your-neck” like “past-your-eyes milk.”Located in the center of a park, the old house has lots of flowers and a large, multi-step wooden deck. It’s a comfortable place to spend an hour or two, which is how long you are usually there.

People complain on the internet about the wait for menus, drinks, and your eventual order. It’s not that strange in Europe. And the lack of friendliness isn’t that weird in a post-Soviet country where you don’t speak the language. We bring our own bottles of water and plan to spend the afternoon.

One of their most popular dishes is a Latvian smoked cod stew, but we usually go for meat and potatoes. The pork is always good in Latvia.

We especially like the ribs.

Which are accompanied by strange little potato boats.

Last time we were here I was tempted by a house special called “Naughty Letters,” which was bull testicles. I am just a very curious person, and have also been known to accept dares even when no one is daring me. When am I going to get this chance again? Last year I saw a couple next to us get what I assumed was this dish, a shiny meat bag filled with meatloaf. It looked like haggis. They were loving it.

So, this time around, I really thought about it, and as Bob has learned to do over the years, he just said, “I’m not going to tell you what to order.” I am not a fan of organ meat in general, although I do like in descending order:

Foie Gras. Like meat butter. Pure heaven. And I would rather be a foie gras goose than a Foster Farms chicken any day.

Gizzards: I grew up eating chicken gizzards, and I enjoy them fried in batter at Dinah’s in Glendale.

Cow’s stomach (tripe) in fiery hot menudo. Again, I grew up with it and I don’t know if I would like any other preparation.

Beef heart: I had a carne asada-style preparation at St John’s in London, and it was OK, if not amazing. Chef Kuniko Yago prepared beef heart dumplings once for a Jonathan Gold event and they were honestly one of the best things I have ever eaten.

Tongue: I once had an amazing banh mi sandwich made by Chef Ray Garcia, but I’ve also had it several times where I don’t like the powdery texture.

Sweetbreads: I was once bullied by two esteemed chefs into eating some at a food event. They were crisp, fatty and delicious. I tried them at an Argentinian chain restaurant and didn’t get past the first bite. Good chefs can make anything delicious and bad cooks can make anything awful.

I am not in love with Haggis, though due to my Scottish heritage I have eaten a polite serving several times. It’s sheep’s pluck (heart, liver, and lungs), along with oats and spices, cooked while traditionally encased in the animal’s stomach. It could do with a lot more spices.

I can’t stand chicken liver, beef liver, brains or kidneys.

So…I tried asking questions to figure the testicles out. I asked if they were filled with beef, like haggis. I mean, I eat hot dogs and sausages in natural casings (intestine). So it would be like that, or like haggis. Just plain old ground meat. The menu does say “stuffed.” I ordered it. It took FOREVER to arrive, along with Bob’s lovely fish.

It wasn’t the same thing as I saw last year.

I sliced into it, and discovered that the purple veins went through and through. It was not full of meat. Well, it WAS. Full of testicle meat. I’m knee-deep in my own dare now. I can’t back out. I cut a bite and it tasted –exactly like beef liver. Which I hate. Of course it was organ meat…sexual organs. Of course! Well, I just had to know, and now I knew.

Later that night, after Bob had left to stay with his mom, I thanked the gods for Pici Pizza! And then I made jokes about balls the entire rest of the trip, which you know is the real reason I ordered them.

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We had lunch at Flying Pigs, which again, was delicious. I don’t usually trust menus that have too wide of a variety of food, but Bob’s mom’s Thai noodles, Bob’s shish, and my shrimp salad were all perfect.

We drove past the medical museum but didn’t go in, but the murals were cool

Random stuff:

I pointed out the exposed brick to Bridin and asked, “Is that a style?”

She said, “That’s from getting bombed.

The drive through the green countryside to Liepaja was gorgeous, if long.

The thing about driving in a country that is 50% forest is that once you have passed that rest stop in the middle, there is nowhere to stop for two hours. I finally accepted that I was going to have to piss in the woods. We pulled off on a dirt road. Nervous, I asked, “Isn’t this someone’s driveway?”

“No, it’s just a dirt road.”

We pulled over and I asked, “What is that? Is that a sign? Is this a hiking trail?”

“No, it’s fine. Just go.” So, I walked behind the trees and saw that it was a mailbox! I looked behind me, and there was a house that was probably already watching me. We went further up the road, and I waded DEEEEP into the forest. My feet sunk into about four inches of organic decomposition. I later told Bridin there were mushrooms. She asked if they were edible, but I didn’t want to investigate any further. Anyways, I’m a city mouse; how would I know?

No sooner did we pull back on the highway, what did we see? A friggin gas station!

When we arrived at Art Hotel, they had given me the same room as last year, so I was pleased.

We walked over to River in the hotel next door on Bridin’s recommendation. I ordered beef cheeks with a cherry sauce that were tender and rich. Bob’s pork was nice. The beef here isn’t usually very good because they aren’t pumped full of crap and grain fed like ours. Grass fed is ethically better, but the meat is tougher. I stole some of Bob’s potatoes. Latvians are realllyyy into potatoes. They sell enormous sacks of them by the side of the road.

The server was unfriendly until I said, “Thank you,” in Latvian and she rewarded me with a smile.

As usual, the next morning Art Hotel had a fantastic buffet breakfast.

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There is a large Art Nouveau district in Riga, though you can often see turrets, curvy lines, faces, goddesses and floral decorations on buildings all over the city. 850 buildings from the turn of the century (1990, the “early one.”), are considered authentic Art Nouveau, with many of them protected by UNESCO.

We enjoyed the buildings of mikhail eisenstein on alberta and Strelnieku streets. it is considered an open-air museum. He was born in 1867 to a poor Jewish family in Saint Petersburg. He lived and worked as an architect for 20 years in Riga, where he designed almost 20 Art Nouveau masterpieces.

2A Alberta Street 

The building is covered in screaming faces and a more Egyptian/robot vibe, if there is such a thing. You can also pose with the cool griffins. The arches at the top are also a beautiful use of negative space.

4 Alberta Street

Looking much more like a confectionary than any of the others, it nonetheless features lions, gorgons and griffins. Three faces near the top appear to be deep in conversation or maybe singing.

8 Alberta Street

Part of a row of attached 3-story bays, with lions’ heads, pelicans, flowers and trippy faces.

12 Alberta Street

This building, in the style of National Romanticism, is way more about the turrets and I didn’t get a lot of detail.

13 Alberta Street

Peacocks, nymphs and satyrs frolic across this building’s facade. As we approached it, Bob kept pointing out a giant face.

Where????

Right there, under the flags!

I don’t see it!

Oh!

This building isn’t listed anywhere, but I have photographic proof it exists. More singing people!

Stayed tuned for more…

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